It’s also probably safe to claim there haven't been many relationships in history that haven’t required some feedback giving. There’ve been socks on the floor since socks were invented.
Be it a romantic relationship, family relationship, collegial relationship, or customer relationship, there are always things that aren’t quite right. Because we’re all fallible and weird people in progress, we can’t always behave perfectly. Even if something would be perfect for us, it’s sometimes not perfect for a different type of person we’re dealing with. Clashes will inevitably happen when different people are put together to do things.
To build healthy, effective collegial relationships, we should learn how to have constructive feedback discussions often and easily. We should also learn to handle the feedback effectively together. If the team makes giving feedback a regular habit, it ensures the team stays vital and operational.
Sometimes nothing has to change, and the feedback giver simply needs to get the feedback off their hearts. Being allowed to tell what is bothering you and being truly heard can sometimes be enough. Often something needs to be developed, and that development can make the whole team better off.
If we leave things unsaid, they start to gnaw. We begin to feel resentment towards people. Every time they behave in a way we wish they didn’t, negative emotions build up. We become hostile, which they probably notice. It starts to slowly deteriorate the relationship and the whole team. This is why it’s so important to get things out in the open and talk them through.
The saddest thing is others might not have a problem changing their behavior if they knew it was bothering us. When we finally manage to tell what’s making us angry, often the reaction from the other is: “why haven’t you said anything sooner!” So much time has passed for nothing, and if only we had said something, things could’ve been better ages ago.
So we need to learn to give feedback even if it makes us uncomfortable. Even if we worry we might hurt people’s feelings. It becomes easier when we learn effective ways to deliver feedback. That’s why you’re here.